Sunday, 1 December 2013
Jacinda week 14
I could hear a loud noise,was this a earthquake,this has happened before. And then the noise stopped. I looked out the window I saw everyone running up the mountain, what was happening. there was a siren going off so loud it hurt my ears. my mum came and got me from my room she said “go get the baby”. I ran to my baby sisters room she was crying I grabbed her and I ran outside and ran up the mountain I knew now was happening it was a tsurnami, I had to save me and my sister. My mum and dad died.
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ReplyDeleteHello Jacinda,
ReplyDeleteWow! You seem to understand the dangers earthquakes can bring. I know New Zealand has more frequent, larger earthquakes than we have here in Australia and earthquakes at sea can cause tsunamis. Did you know Hawaii also has tsunami warning sirens along its coast? Just as in your story, if locals hear the siren, they move to higher ground. Well done. :)
I can see the care you have taken in your exactly 105 word entry. There are some mistakes you have missed when rereading your entry before posting but I know how easy it can be to miss them when you have a good idea to share. I always have to check my writing more than once. Again, well done.
I hope you continue entering the 100WC. In a future entry, we might have the chance to discover how your character coped looking after a little sister without parents.
Ross Mannell (Team 100WC)
Teacher (retired), N.S.W., Australia
thank you
DeleteAnd I did know that Hawaii also have tsunami warning sirens along the coast
Wow! This story kept me on the edge of my seat. I had to keep reading more and more because I wanted to find out what was going on. The story had a bittersweet ending since you and your sister survived, but not your parents. I am sure you were caught up in the excitement of writing this story, so you missed a few periods (or full stops). Be sure to start a new sentence when there is a new idea, and start sentences with a capital letter.
ReplyDeleteKeep up the good work!